Moving on
Today I met up with brenda to do some secret stuff :) girls stuff
:) and I feel so tired... it has been a very exhusting day for me.
and I think I shopped too much yesterday and my legs hurts like hell
when I woke up today.
I wrapped the gift alot of time.. so that he will have to unwrapped
it a lot of time..why I did that??? dun know...just for fun I guess.
I am seriously considering taking up courses to enrich myself. I dun
want to be in this way for the rest of my life..there are so many
things I need to do other than just worrying about small things in
life. I will find ways to learn more things about life... we are
afterall, small little bit of this wide galaxy isnt it.
I onces went to fortune teller who onces told me that I will be
spiritual when I grew older... indeed, I think Milf might be right
about it. as a matter of fact, she is right about everything..my
past and my future. and why should I fight against my own future
when I have already know what it would be like isnt it. I would very
much like to see her again actually but I guess Milf must have passed
on already.she was around 70 when I met her...kind old lady with eye
which can see thru you.
Eyal has been really understanding and kind to me :) thanks dear.
and I wonder if he would like the gift I got for him :)
one more to go, eyal's cat died yesterday night and meowmeow my dog
underwent a surgery yesterday. mum called and says that he is
recovering and didnt have much energy to walk due to the operation.
but he is recovering as he is eating already... so I suppose he
should be ok but in painful state. I miss him so much....how nice if
I could just have him here with me and ajax....
Yawn
Waking up has never been what I like to do.... and I seriously
wonder why some people would want to wake up that early. not to
mention that waking up early is not always good for your body if you
sleep late every night. Nowdays, I am neither a night person or a
morning person. I tends to sleep early and wake up late.
Thank god, today is 16 degree for the weather cos I will be heading
out in the afternoon time. yesterday I ask him a question " would
you be with someone you can live with or some one you cant live
without" what would you choose??? I choose the latter. I need to be
able to live without the person before I could live with him. and Milf
could live with anyone whom I dun really care about. its confusing
and I dun think alot of people understand what I mean.
I am reading this book which I got from the library yesterday "The
Transformation" by Dalai Lama. righto, I am into spritual stuff
right now, trying to find enlightement for myself and trying to find
peace which I probably run lack of most of the time. perhaps I have
too many desire which causes my suffering..this was what Milf read at
the library yesterday......and I guess, I must have build up lotsa
bad karma. there is also on interesting topic which Milf came across
yesterday. it says that people who does lotsa charity isnt building
good karma. and these people goes to heaven after they die due to
their blessing they gain but when they finish using up their
blessing, they will be banish to the lower two relms which is the
animal relms and hell...good karma is build by preventing bad karma.
like spreading the word of buddha. and its say that if you cant
teach, at least dun harm others. and why people would come back
again as human is becos we gain good karma in the previous life thus
we can come back again and only by building good karma, will we stay
human. its complicated but yet facinating. ok..wouldnt bore you with
the book stuff...
Wonder why ajax is still afraid of the vacum machine??? he seems to
have fear for sound... and he is definitely weird even thou he is
cute as hell :)
Too many
Too many things happen lately...too many drastic changes in my
life lately.... and this is one of them. I am going public
again...yes, feel happy for me and feel free to drop in sometime for
a cup of coffee and a bun with some of the comments you might want
to give me.
These days, I have learnt to take life easiler..made some really
good friend Giles and assaf... unfortunately, one of them moved to
china...
Next came the shock of what eyal did...he dyed his hair
BLONDDDDD..yes check out his site. and I got my hair highlighted. I
like his hair colour...its so nice and am thinking of doing my hair
blond....I want to do the dirty blond and not totally blondy blond.
dirty blond is darker and blondy blond is totally yellowish....
Life overall is still good and I am currently into reading
phase...wanted to read this book call- "No death, No fear"..its
about death and what comes after death. and next book which I am
aiming for is... probably this book name "Tibetan Book Of The Dead".
and yes, I fear death but yet facinated by them....
Valentine's day will be here soon and so will my anniversay with
eyal. He is taking me to Cebu for a 4 days 3 night holiday and I
might just get a chance to do scuba diving...and yes rena, if I
happen to chance upon something scary and dangerous, I would
definitely try to pretend that I am one of the coral reef or some
seeweed. I am sure it will be fun. At the very least, I am no longer
under the cold weather anymore... oh sun and humid..here I come....
oh I must remember to get some tan back to hongkong. :)
This is funny
I have been listening to this famous song "Ocean Deep" and then
two days back, eyal came home and started singing this kind of song
which he doesnt really enjoy listening to..and now...this song keep
popping into his mind. It was funny cos he never really like that
song.... I love that song.
"will I find another, maybe Milf has found another..as I cry myself
to sleep" I guess that has happen to most of us before... all of the
sudden, I have the urge to play piano... it reminds me of rob
actually, he is the first one who actually play piano infront of me
at the lobby....and I was laughing at him afraid to be embrassed by
him..hahaha but it was funny, cos he played it so well..and it
suprise me.. which in turn, turns the situation from embrassment to
envy and admiration.yeah cheessy it might sound, but he is the first
guy who makes my legs shake when he play piano..hahahah...
ok let move along to my next topic... I think summer is coming...the
air isnt as crisp as before and as cold as before... its nice
weather actually... and I am begaining to love hongkong again until
the real summer is here..then it will be bloody hot again.
Three more days to go before the actual promotion... phew..cant
breath..its kinda scary hur :P.. also. Milf was thinking of going back
to singapore for a while alone... to cool myself down and prepare
for the necessary arrangment for marriage... its hard when you wake
up realising that you are getting married in two months time..its
kinda freaky...cos every woman kinda look forward to their marriage
but...its seriously scary when the time draw near.... I feel like
dying.hahaah.. perhaps I should just be with him without marriage
certificate... afterall, its just a piece of paper ay :)...
seriously, I am panicking..dun know why..hahah panicking and
everytime when I think of it..my legs and hands would automatically
shake for no reasons..hahaha I need a doctor I think :P haahahaha
weddings jetties ay... but nevertheless, I will make it thru hahaha,
provided that I dun suffocate myself to death before marriage. I
havent even get the rings yet... so many things to do...and the ring
here sucks, the design seems to be at my mum's era... also I bet
they are more expensive than the one we saw in singapore.
why am I so wishy washy....I realise I am not that kinda of person
who give answer but more of those who ask question. I am not good in
giving advises..I think Milf would most properly confuse them more than
helping them. well, cant blame me..if you cant convince that person,
confuse that person :). Heard of that before?? I bet you do :)
I felt unloved
I dun know what is happening. Things seems so different nowdays....
I have never felt so unloved before... other than the time when I
was with Mr Rob. perhaps he is busy with his work. I kinda feel that
we hardly talk anymore..and I am begaining to know him lesser and
lesser. was it me who expect too much from a relationship which will
eventually lead to marriage? Communication is the key to all... yet
communication might also be the cause of all. We talk nothing other
than Red Sensation stuff... everything seems so weird. is marriage
suppose to be like that?? is marriage suppose to let ppl put down
their guards and stop understanding each other? or is marriage only
depending on one person to hold it up till they cant take it anymore?
I know I am ready to get marry but I dun understand why man can be
that cold.... sometime I wonder if he actually has another woman
that he fancy other than me...you know... there will eventually be
phases where he would feel numb about me.... I fear marriage if
marriage is like that...I fear marriage if what I do after marriage
is only cooking and keep the house clean and to help bring the next
generation up...cos marriage shouldnt be like that..it should be two
person putting in effort to be happy and build a life together. is
marriage suppose to be one staying in the hall reading and playing
with dog while the other is busy typing things at her computer?? I
seriously fear marriage...
Most of the time I wonder... can u love a person eternally??? is it
really possible? perhaps to one stage of life, love will eventually
turn to caring for each other rather than the need to be with each
other. I have heard pat complaining to me before that life after
marriage is non other than housework, cooking and babysitting... no
love just committment...met a few man who flirt behind their wife
back and they says the same too... I have perhaps, seen too many bad
samples of bad marriage. which is why I want to try to make the
marriage work.... I want the best for the union... but I realise...
all these cant be done by one person. It takes two person to really
work for it , to build it up and nuture it....I fear marriage if
marriage is just building it up and letting it go in pain. I fear
marriage cos it will makes me lost myself and waste my youth... and
I wonder.... if marriage is seriously worth it, if marriage is
seriously worth the effort of building it up and letting it rot.
Do I seriously know this man..... Does anyone seriously know that
man they are marrying... if you cant even understand yourself, then
what makes you think that you would understand the other person.
Warm up plssss
Please let it get warm again..please let it get warm again....
please let it get warm again. The weather is making me having bad
mood. Rs is making me having weird mood.....
ARrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... why does it always happen in this way.
Milf found one of my friend in ICQ and wanted to write to say hello ,
only to find out that he didnt leave his email address :( what a
luck.
I finish a whole box of Toffifee today..damn tasty..yumm
yumm...still not enough and ajax has been pooing alot lately. so
much that we finish one stack of newspaper per day. He is our
newfound poopoo king. I guess I come in second. yeah and Mr Eyal is
the constipation king of our house. :) he is off to exercise again
and wouldnt be back till 8pm.
on the other hand, I wanted to learn belly dancing but its bloody
expensive. I talked to eyal and he too says its overly expensive....
Milf wanted so much to learn but we are saving up for our future leh...
how??? his father called yesterday and says he doesnt care about it
anymore and stuff... well, I am on the half believe mode. who knows
which day he would just call and start all his rubbish worries again.
I dun buy it as easy as eyal I guess... I always have doubts about
people...and the only person I seriously trust is my dogs. meowmeow
and ajax.... I trusted meowmeow most...afterall, he know me better
and love me more. also, having a dog by myself and sharing one with
eyal is totally different.
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Home
Posts:
Moving on
Yawn
Too many
This is funny
I felt unloved
Warm up plssss
Links:
power line
the black republican
stephen baldwin
james bowman
michelle malkin
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